Chaos, charm and Joue not enough to get the win for the 2s.

There are games where the scoreboard tells the story… and then there are games like this one, where the chaos, charm, and occasional brilliance of rugby at Hurlingham Park deserve far more than a glance at the numbers.

Under clear skies and with the familiar hum of touchline optimism, Hammersmith & Fulham II welcomed Belsize Park II for a 3pm kickoff that promised entertainment—and duly delivered in spades.
Hammers couldn’t have asked for a better opening. Straight from Belsize’s first attacking phase, skipper Max Dugdale read the play like a well-thumbed novel, plucking an intercept out of thin air and sprinting 30 metres to dot down under the posts. A captain’s try. Statement made.

Belsize, however, were in no mood to admire. They struck back quickly with a long-range effort of their own, setting the tone for what would become a relentless attacking display.

The Hammers scrum was in destructive mood early on, with props Jordan Brown and Dylan Johns leading a dominant shove that had Belsize retreating even on their own ball. But rugby, as ever, is a cruel game—despite the dominance, Belsize managed to keep possession, and just as the front row surfaced for some well-earned oxygen, the visitors had already crossed the whitewash again.

Belsize’s backs began to find rhythm, piling on pressure and points with clinical efficiency. Amidst the onslaught, Geoff Mahon produced a moment that will live long in Hurlingham folklore—a 50:22 “banana kick” that bent space and time (and possibly physics), landing Hammers deep in the Belsize 22. Even Johnny Sexton might have raised an eyebrow.

Sensing opportunity, Hammers turned to their banker ball: HRM Black. The maul rumbled forward with menace, falling just short—but it felt like a warning shot.

Before the half closed, George Nellany decided enough was enough. With pace that like Lightning McQueen in the Dinoco 400, he ran around the Belsize defence like a playground prodigy, leaving defenders clutching at fresh air.

Half Time: Hammers 10 – 33 Belsize.

The second half began with a whistle—but what followed was louder. Much louder. From the restart, No. 8 Samson Hart bellowed “MINE!” with such authority that rumours suggest it was heard somewhere near Farnham. The tone was set.

Hammers pressed early, earning a lineout deep in Belsize territory. The initial maul was expertly disrupted—but in true rugby fashion, that proved a mere red herring. Ben Bradshaw, clutching both ball and the men in front of him with equal determination, powered over for his first of 2 tries for the day.

Moments later, Belsize attempted to clear under pressure—an error they would soon regret. What followed was counter-attacking rugby at its finest. The “Fantastic Four” of Anushan Elanco, Geoff Mahon, Sam Heron, and Sam “Twinkletoes” Nursey combined with slick hands and intent. Nursey, dancing through defenders as expected, eventually found himself wrapped up—but not before slipping an offload to Paddy O’Toole.

And then… the miracle.

As O’Toole surged forward, the Belsize defence seemed to hesitate—momentarily convinced they weren’t dealing with a hooker, but something more biblical. Mistaking him for Moses himself, the purple sea parted in front of him, leaving a clear path to glory. From 40 metres out, there was only ever going to be one outcome. Try time. Pandemonium.

Belsize continued to show their attacking class, running in further tries through their dangerous backline. Hammers got one last attempt in, with crashing over for his second—putting a fitting exclamation mark on a determined second-half showing

Full Time: Hammers 29 – 55 Belsize.

While the scoreboard may not flatter the hosts, this was a performance brimming with grit, flashes of brilliance, and no shortage of character. And in the metric that truly matters… Hammers secured a resounding victory in the boat race.

With the cup run looming, the fire is well and truly lit. Onward.